What is Couples Counseling?

Posted on Jul 15, 2021

What is Couples Counseling?

Couples counseling typically involves Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT) and Cognitive Behavioral Techniques / Exercises (CBT) which can help you to grow your positive relationship, and help you avoid negative emotions such as disillusionment, loss of love/affection, resentment, and separation or divorce.

Also, Couples Counseling is much more scientific today (ie: research & outcomes focused). As such it has become an easier decision as more and more people make use of this tool. It is now viewed by most medical professionals as medically necessary for optimal relationship health when issues or challenges arise and interfere with your adult daily life.

If you and your partner have ever thought of couples’ therapy, the chances are quite good that you need it. This is because most people tend to minimize, deny and avoid conflict. Knowing what to expect and how to set appropriate goals with your counselor is important as well.

What can I Expect?

You can expect couples counseling to occur at least once per week, and last from one to three months on the short end to process change. Couples Counseling will likely include homework and exercises to practice in between your weekly sessions. Depending on your counselor’s treatment approach, you and your partner may spend the first session going over your situation, the history of your relationship, and your hopes for therapy. From there, your counselor may schedule separate sessions for each of you to learn one-on-one about your goals and expectations of the relationship and of therapy. Subsequent sessions would include the two of you together.

Goal Setting:

Both of you can assess your commitment to each other and motivation for change as you set goals for therapy. Goals will depend on your situation, but can include:

• Effective Communication.
• Thriving through Life-changing Events.
• Conducting Family Meetings.
• Clarifying Values Conflicts.
• Work/Home Roles & Parenting Strain.
• Infidelity/ Solving Sexual Problems.
• Managing Midlife Crisis.

Your Counselor will:

• Provide an unbiased, safe, and private setting for you and your partner to explore your relationship.
• Help you identify conflicts and decide what changes to make—both one at a time and within the relationship.
• Work on finding common ground rather than assigning blame.

You and your partner can:

• Be willing to view your relationship from a new perspective.
• Take responsibility for your actions.
• Share self-discoveries, even after the counseling ends.
• It may take 10 to 15 sessions before you both see progress in your relationship.

Choosing the right therapist

Look for a Licensed and experienced counselor who will tailor therapy to you and your partner’s strengths and challenges.

Your therapist should be sensitive to your needs. When you come away from counseling, you both will likely feel your therapist is an understanding ally.

Both you and your partner should feel comfortable with your therapist, so take time to evaluate how your therapist affects each of you.